I need some help in this...

[Kushan's_Wrath]

Where I game, there is a kid. I know not his name, but his face and voice are easily recalled. I was trying to play a 40K game (3000 pts., SM (me) vs. Necrons. Ended in a tie- called on account of time) and here he was, talking about the Necrons, and saying all sorts of weird and annoying things about zombies and ice and fire melting icve and needing these weapons and that... no knowledge at all about 40K. This wasn't that bad. This was a minor annoyance, so, I smiled and nodded, and went on with it. Trying to be nice. (It doesn't help that he won a raffled BfM set- the figures will probably end up painted like... ugh... heresy...). Then, he starts saying that we "cannot go through the forest" because "Pokemon lived there". That was when things got a little trying. Pokemon? And then he started calling the area "Pokemon planet" or whatever, and named all (what, 350, 400?) of the things, saying that Venusaur, Beedrill, Victreebell, etc., etc., etc. all lived there and that if we went near the large, weird tree we had set up as a centerpiece that Primapes would jump out and hurt us, because they were, quote, "really tough".

At this point I, quite understandably, was getting a little annoyed. The person I was playing against had dismissed him a couple times with "That's nice" and kept going. Eventually, I told him that in the Darkness of the Far Future no one cared about Pokemon, and that they'd probably just slaughter them on the way to the robots. He then replied that Beedrills had "really, really long stingers in the far future". At this point, one of us, I forget who, told him off, but in a gentle way. Then, he said "I suppose you're tired of my imagination, too?"

Thus, he'd been pestering someone else (this was later confirmed). What imagination does it take to name 5 billion Pokemon??!?! And he stuck out his lip, and whined, and eventually, his mother came and picked him up. But GAH!!!! How can I stop this?? How can I end the madness?

He seems... sensitive, and I can relate to this, as I was a fair bit like him. In second grade. I am still... emotionally sensitive as a person (not many know this... until now) and I do not want to hurt the kid at all, but I want him to leave me alone. He is a seventh grader, and I feel he should have grown up a little (or, in French "un peu") by now. Can anyone help?

And, by the way, if the other player is here (He of the poor dice. He who owns the Titan and Pylon. You know who you are, you Utahn) I would appreciate his perspective on this.

[Brother Wolf]

Wow, I've been annoyed before, but that was irritating just READING about it. Kudos for sticking it out so long.

The fact of the matter is that, unfortnately, having infinite patience is pretty much the only way to get by at most game shops. I mena, let's be realistic, most game shops are like the island of misfit toys. The best thing you can generally do is nip it in the bud, politely and quietly. If someone comes over to watch my game and I'm, shall we say, not in the mood to be social outside of my opponent, I politely ask them to go observe a different game. Perhaps I ask them simply that if they wish to watch my game, could they please be quiet.

Patience and manners go a long way towards keeping game night calm, fun and enjoyable. The kid sounds like he obviously needs an outlet of some sort. At 12 years old, he should be thinking about girls, rock music and blowing things up like every other 12 year old boy, not Pokemon and the magical mystery trees. Maybe you should bring a dog eared copy of a decent 40K novel next time. If he starts to pester you, shove the book at him, tell him to read a coupld chapters and bring the book back by the time your game ends.

[Kushan's_Wrath]

My only problem: I don't own any, unfortunately.

[Brother Wolf]

Then the polite, "shut up or move it", appears to be your only option...

[cfoley]

You could always suggest that one of the store staff could play an introductory game with him.

[Voyager_I]

the kid might have issues, too. Don't know what to do about that.

[Piccolo]

Obviously this child is suffering from 1 of 2 problems. He has either been beaten too much or not enough. When it doubt see if you can apply some additonal beatings to resolve the problem, your odds of being right are 50/50.

[cfoley]

At 12 years old, he should be thinking about girls, rock music and blowing things up like every other 12 year old boy

So, he is obsessed with pokeamon. We are all obsessed with little toy soldiers.

[The Collector]

The theory goes that the hobbyists know that this is a recreational game and know when to connect/disconnect it from their normal lives, and that the boy doesn't.

In any case, you are stuck in a bit of quandry, My question is, what is the boy there for? His mother is there (engage warning klaxons), so he could be window shopping or playing some other game.

Do you have that information for us?

[Unforgiven1977]

Smite him in the name of the Emperor.

[TS_ahriman]

Flaying sounds more suitable.

If it actually becomes a regular occurance and that child can't understand when people are being cold, you might just want to ignore him as much as is humanly possible. Minimal eye contact, minimal/no response to whether there are venonats in the far future.......i guess it would be the wargamer equivalent of shunning.

[General Stukov]

Smite him in the name of the Emperor.

Lol... I've done that quite a few times when I've played, only to little kids who touch my models...

This kid either sounds like he's neglected by his parents alot or he's just REALLY into pokemon (or retarded but hey we all have had to deal with those mentally challenged before), try asking him to find some other kids his age to play or talk about pokemon... I know I had a kid like that, kids can be imaginative at times and its good to encourage them sometimes but when it gets to the unhealthy scale is when it must be delt with... One way to deal with this is simply to tell him, "Im sorry but its very hard to concintrate on playing with you talking to us" if he asks why, just explain to him in simple terms (like using his hobby as a basis) that your thoughts require a clear path to beable to function... an example for pokemon...

"Hey Yea know how you have to decide which pokemon to use and what attack to do against your enemy? Well I need to have the same concintration to make my attacks as well"

That usually does the trick for me and if Im not in the mood or short fused I simply ask the kid to bother someone else, then again if I was in a game of 40k I wouldnt be short fused but thats just me 8)

In short, if he continues to bother you just ask the hobby shop manager to occupy the kid's attention till he or his mom can, around my hobby shop we have alot of girls that come in to play games, (*gasps* egads! girls!!!) and they are more then willing to snag the lil bugger up and turn his attention elsewhere...

A feminine presence will cause the child to become more mindful of things he says and wont be so free to blurt out random occurances of stupidity... *sighs as he remembers that age* ahhh I remember at 12 I was trying to toss rocks at gators...

anyhow hope that helps 8)

[Thalasion]

I say threaten him with either the heavyest/pointyest peice of terain on the board, or the rulebook.

[Dante]

:(

Seventh grade and pokemon???

Ok sure i played the games...but that stopped in 5th grade...
(hey im still a youngin :))

I really hate kids liek that, but for me its more like ten year olds, with parents that think GW is a daycare...

I hate those!

"hey why is your army red? why aren't they blue like in the book?"

*points to dread* "is that robot strong? can he fly?"

I try to be nice...but if they don't get the hint the first couple of times...I'm gonna tell them to shove off.

And if they start the touching my models...I get really pissed.
Don't be afraid to give those kids a scare...they need it.

You'd prolly be helping them too...i mean if they are that sensitive maybe with your brutal assualts he can build up some sort of normal interactions with people...

[Kaoslord]

Buy a Taser. Can't go wrong with 35 volts of alternating current applied to the neck.

Seriously though, you can't escape them if you game in public, unless you're at a club. Even then, probably not. You've just got to tune him out, and make it abundently clear that he is NOT to touch your models without asking.

If he's just window shopping, or worse, left there while mum gets a haircut, make it clear to the staff that you're a paying customer, and he isn't, and it's your business they'll loose if they don't do something about him. You'd be surprised how often that works.

[Icarus]

around my hobby shop we have alot of girls that come in to play games

:wow: What??? Girls? You mean they.... no.... they actually come into the.... no..... argh......... i have to lie down.

[Kushan's_Wrath]

Whoops, should have mentioned this. It is actually located at a Junior High with an after-school program, because it is a teacher there that organizes it all, and such. Maybe she does think of it as a daycare of sorts.

To reply to the posts in order:
cfoley: maybe Mr. Wright (the school teacher). He works well with those people. In fact, he works well with just about everyone.

Voyager_I: From what I've seen, he probably does, but I'm not sure. Last thing I want is to be sued for mental damages...

Piccolo: Oh, right, like I'm going to beat him up and then wait until his mom shows up... that means either jail, a lawsuit, probation, community service, or a combination of any of those...

Is it just me, or are you slightly more caustic then usual, lately?

cfoley: All too true...

The Collector: Sounds about right. Seeing as this is an after school thing, he's probably just there to keep him off his parent's hands for awhile, or something. It's only once every two weeks...

Wait a minute, a little while ago Mr. Wright ran a recruitment drive, and this kid saw a game and luckily WON a BfM. Maybe now his mom thinks he SHOULD go because he won that. He never brings them... I guess all I can do is get him to paint his SM or 'Nids, and try to teach him that this is a separate universe, full of its own diversity and lore, and try to explain to him that it does not MATTER if it is fire or lightning... If I can survive through it.

Unforgiven: I would, but I flunked Inquisitor 101.

Ahriman: I suppose so. I think that I will try, very calmly and patiently to explain this, but if he refuses to grasp this, I'll just have to do that.

Stukov: Thanks, I don't think he's retarded. He also doesn't get any hint, whatsoever.

Thalasion: Sorry, no pointy terrain pieces (believe it or not) and I only have the BfM version of the rulebook. Come back here and let me whap you with this small flimsy book!

Dante: Yeah. Those questions are just about right from some things I've heard at other tables...

Kaoslord: Love to, but GW has all my money. At least he doesn't touch.

Icarus: We had one of them in there one time. No, twice. Never played the game, really, though.

[theshadowduke]

Heh, I have delt with kids like that at my local RT. Luckly for me the staff there likes the majority of the WH players more then they like the annoying kids that get cards.

Last time I had some kid bug me and the guy I was playing with, we ignored him for awhile (like 2 full turns plus setup), and then we both told him to piss off or we would hit him. And we said it pretty much like that.

Long story short, he mom walks up to us demanding an apology and we told her that maybe if she spanked her kid once in a while he wouldnt be so annoying, she told the manager, the manager told her that we spend more money in there, so we would be more important. Havnt seen the kid since.

[ChunkyMrEvil]

You could always just point him to this topic, you'll probably never see him again then... The poor little tyke...

BTW that was sarcasm, a kid like that in his Seventh year probably doesn't get to spend his lunch money too often and probably doesn't have too many friends to hang around with instead of annoying you so just try to weather the storm until he snaps into normality :beer:

[The Collector]

BfM? [Edit: Battle for Macragge?]

[DaRKNeZz_Ogre]

I have a few kids that come around the store I go to that like to talk alot. I just try to be friendly as I can and if I start to get very anoyed and usualy say "I am trying to focus on this very important battle between my guys and his/hers how about I will find you when I am done and we can talk more" (the parrent by then usualy picks them up or they forget) It works all the time. They never mean any harm at all and usualy are just there becuase they think it is cool or exciting. Maybe they are intrested and want to start playing to. I have meet a few kids that like pokemon that are over the age of 12 and they are usualy missing a few french frys from there happy meal. Violence will never solve anything while involving childeren, it will most likeley hurt the kid more then s/he already is. Or the parent will get violent with you and it will take money and time out of your hands. I would just simply be nice to them.

[theshadowduke]

I have a few kids that come around the store I go to that like to talk alot. I just try to be friendly as I can and if I start to get very anoyed and usualy say "I am trying to focus on this very important battle between my guys and his/hers how about I will find you when I am done and we can talk more" (the parrent by then usualy picks them up or they forget) It works all the time. They never mean any harm at all and usualy are just there becuase they think it is cool or exciting. Maybe they are intrested and want to start playing to. I have meet a few kids that like pokemon that are over the age of 12 and they are usualy missing a few french frys from there happy meal. Violence will never solve anything while involving childeren, it will most likeley hurt the kid more then s/he already is. Or the parent will get violent with you and it will take money and time out of your hands. I would just simply be nice to them.


I generally try to be nice first, but the frelling kids usually dont get it. Not only that, the kids at my local RT seem to have this thing about touching our models, actually had a kid drop a very nicely converted bloodthirster from WFB. The owner wasnt looking, and the kid picked it up, was showing his friends, and dropped it. I swear I heard a vein pop in Mike's head.... But just in time, staff came back (was watching on camera) and ensured the child didnt meet an "untimely" demise at the hands of the WH players. We have told both the staff and most of the kids not to touch our stuff, but they just dont listen. The staff listens, and trys to keep the kiddies away, but we have just learned that being mean, or threatening them usually gets rid of them.

[HaXxorIzed]

Seriously, he has his obsessions, you have yours. Be frank, and tell him Pokemon doesn't exist in the far future, and prove it too him without being to mean about it. Also, try and get him involved in the game or find him some pokemon cards to play in the corner.

A good way to get him off the Interuption of your games with his own obsessions is to challenge him to write some background about the Pokemon in Warhammer. I know it sounds crazy, but try it - he exhausts the obvious creative energy, learns to write, and you only have to spend 15 minutes reading it and telling him what's wrong, instead of having him in your hair all day long.

It worked for me with all the annoying kids that badger me a lot. Mind you, I'm pretty much the only one they annoy (I am just a little better than everyone else in my gaming club, so naturally they all annoy "the awesome guy". (No, they call me that. I've been playing this for a long time ,since I was 11 is all)

As for Games, Tabletop minatures and women, my fiancee plays Warhammer 40k. As the Biel Tan Eldar, and she can beat most people I know. See! Women do play these games!

[Cathode]

Id buy some ball bearings paint them red and white with a black stripe, and magneticaly attach them to your forces. Next time you have to face those "though primapes" in the pokemon forest shout, "Carniflex I chose you!".

[DaRKNeZz_Ogre]

MMmmm, I am assuming they do not ask before they touch. If they do touch them just simply say "Do not touch them at all" in a firm voice so they don't think your are kidding or anything. If they break them you can talk to the parent before they leave and demand that they refund you for the damages the child may have done. Also yu can get the store owner and they will I gauruntee back you up.